nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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