I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
