Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Randomize
