my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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