Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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