Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Randomize
