I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
There r osticjed everywhere
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
