the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
two words...techno handjob
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
