Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
