dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Randomize
