hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
