Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
