Sponge bath it is.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
