So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Randomize
