How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
