Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize