We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
My vagina is officially offended.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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