Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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