i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
