I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
