They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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