It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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