so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
