when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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