Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
