So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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