Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Randomize