I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Randomize
