some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
