ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Randomize
