Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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