It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Randomize
