I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
