The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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