He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
she pinky promised me she was 18
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
