Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
