I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
last night I used snow as a chaser
Randomize
