You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
