i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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