I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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