All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Randomize
