Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
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