Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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