You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Randomize
