Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
