I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
