one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
