As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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