i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
It's not a walk of shame if you run
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
