woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
